Who Owns the Insult?
2026-10-12
Who Owns the Insult?

Who Owns the Insult?
There is an old Buddhist story that carries a simple but powerful lesson.
 
A man once became angry with the Buddha and began insulting him. The Buddha listened quietly and then asked:
 
“If someone offers you a gift, but you refuse to accept it, to whom does the gift belong?”
 
The man answered, “It still belongs to the person who offered it.”
 
The Buddha replied that anger and insults work the same way.
 
If someone insults you, you have a choice.
 
You can accept the insult, become angry, and carry it with you.
 
Or you can simply refuse to receive it.
 
If you do not accept someone’s insult, who does that insult belong to?
 
It remains with the person who gave it.
 
This is an interesting way to think about criticism, especially today. Social media makes it incredibly easy for people to throw anger, accusations, and insults at one another.
 
But someone else's words do not automatically become your burden.
 
You have to accept the package before it becomes yours.
 
Sometimes the most powerful response to an insult is not another insult.
 
It is simply:
 
“No, thank you. You can keep it.”
 
Not every gift needs to be accepted.
 
Especially the bad ones.
 
 
Disclaimer: I use AI as a tool to help create images and proofread my writing. However, the ideas, opinions, experiences, and messages in my posts are my own. AI does not generate my posts for me. It simply helps me present my own words and ideas more clearly.






Kenichi Uchikura
Founder & CEO

Pacific Software Publishing, Inc. (PSPINC)
Uchikura & Co., LLC.

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ABOUT THIS BLOG

I was born and raised in Japan and have spent most of my adult life in the United States. Through this blog, I share Japanese culture, language, expressions, and wisdom. My goal is not to say one culture is better, but to explore different perspectives and what we can learn from them.

Your comments are always welcome.

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